Saturday, October 13, 2012

I Guess We're Gonna Have to Talk About S*x

I hope you are having a great Saturday in this beautiful time of year! Where I live it's wonderfully sunny, the air is crisp, the leaves are beginning to change color, and it's football weather! Aren't you glad God gave us four different seasons? I love each one and feel like they shout, "Worship the Creator God!!!" 

For those of us that call ourselves Christians, we know to worship the Creator and not created things! Let's thank God today for opening our eyes to his truth! "For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever!" (Romans 1:25)

Hold on, my husband just got back from skeet shooting with the men from our church, be right back. I need to......... I'm back, I was going to say... to greet him!

Now where was I. Oh, I was about to tell you.............hold on again..... my husband just called me.

I'm back second time....I have no idea what I was about to say! Oh, I wish I could have you over on this beautiful day to sit and just plain ole talk on our red sofa in the bright sunshine today or out on the back porch. If we could, I would invite you! The next best thing I can invite you to, is what you're doing....being here with me! Welcome! I'll do my best to talk like it's just you and me.
I put everyone's name in our family in one frame,
with a favorite scripture everyone picked out for themselves. I made it when we only had 2 children,
but didn't frame it so I could re-mat it for more children. When we had our 4th child,
my hubby said our quiver was full with our 4 little arrows so I had it framed:-)
Last night we had our Sunday School class over for fellowship. It was so easy because everyone brought an appetizer and it was two friends' birthdays, Jim and Mary, and one of the wives brought the dessert with candles. There was twenty-something of us all visiting on the back porch. 

One wife and I (I won't say name here, you'll see why;-) were talking about the new book from Zondervan by Sheila Wray Gregoire named the good girl's guide to great s*x (subtitled "and you thought bad girls have all the fun") I told her about the "good girl dares" in the book. We giggled like school girls. I shared with her what I told the women the evening before at a speaking engagement I had, where I gave one of the books to a very "lucky" man's wife! Here's what I said:

I was settled all into bed and got out my copy of the book which had just arrived in time for me to give away a free copy of the book to the women I was about to speak to the next day. I had only read the table of contents when my husband came in and saw the title of the book.

When I got right here in the story with the women the other night I said, "I'm not trying to brag, but.... after seeing the title, my husband said, 'What are you reading that for? You don't need that book!' "

All I could think of was Baby, we've come a long way from the honeymoon—it just gets better and better.

The women and I laughed heartily!

I answered his comment with a matter-of-fact, "Oh, it's just a book on Christian marriage," thinking the table of contents looked pretty tame. I started flipping through the book.

Tame was not the right word.

I flipped a page. I flipped another page. And another page. 

I was a bit embarrassed mixed with surprise that a Christian author and publisher took such a step of faithbut shall we say—I was optimistic to be able to recommend it wholeheartedly for Christian marriages. There are no pictures, don't worry. 

The author writes "a good girl dare," that is featured in the side bar every so often in the book. 

Let's just say God makes all things new;-)

I had not planned on buying this book, I just planned to give the two free copies Zondervan mailed me awayone in person the other night at my speaking eventand one through my blog.

Only NOW.......I'm gonna read it and blog about it first! For you? For you nothingfor my husband and my sake! (and then for your marriage, too!) Ain't nothing tame about this author! Sheila thinks of some very creative ideas that will spur on even more creativity in your own personal way!

I've written on this topic briefly in my manuscript that is not yet published (hmmmm, I may be inspired to add to it with the courage this new book has given me!). I believe it to be of utmost importance in marriage. As I told the husband (& friend!) at our fellowship whose animated story is below...(the one who'll you'll read in a sec made out with his wife for an hour to kick off their anniversary weekend...yep, told my friend and I  that)...there's no use Christian women going to choir or Bible study and not fulfilling this area in their life at home for their husband.

Please don't go off and say that Juana Mikels said she doesn't think you should be in the choir or be in a Bible study! What I'm saying is if you don't have energy for both, let someone else be in the choir or do your Bible study at home with a great Bible radio teacher to save energy for your husband ... just make sure you are doing first things first and being intimate with your husband is one of the few things no one else can do for him (you are doing it for you,'s your marriage).

I have always felt that praying for your husband, being intimate with him, and yes, showering with him on occasion are your unique God-given privileges that only you were designed to fulfill and enjoy! (well, other people can pray for our husbands, but our  prayers as his wife and closest friend put us in the top position to take his needs to the God of the universe) 

Physical intimacy in marriage is intended for pleasure. Just think of Sarah in the Bible who experienced the pleasure of  physical intimacy in her 90s! It is to be lifelong, Sisters! 

I'm getting ahead of myself. As I read Sheila's book, we'll talk about it on the blog. Please comment. Ask questions. Come Back. You can comment as anonymous if you want to, and I know you'll be tasteful and courteous:-) I'm looking forward to it. If Shelia Gregoire is brave enough to write the book—the least I can do is take some time on the blog for us to talk about what God said in Genesis is "very good!"  

Last night I told one of my friend's about the book and she said she would get one for her daughter and read it herself! We just about said in unison we could use it as a devotional book with huge smiles on our faces. Then my friend said, "No, as soon as blank (her hubby's name) finds out about it, he will want to read it aloud to me!" (She was not kidding!) 

A husband overheard us mention the book's name and he entered into the conversation. I told him I felt this topic was so important for strong Christian marriages that I'm going to take a few blogs to get down to what scripture says and the nitty-gritty in practical ways with my readers. He thought it was great. He and his wife had recently had their 29th anniversary, and he was happy to report that his good girl wife was a great bad girl (with a huge smile—meaning they have a lot of mutual fun and pleasure in their intimacy). 

We all had so much fun laughing and taking delight in what God designed for intimacy in marriage without ever having to say any specifics whatsoever or getting into anybody's business—it's none of my business, nor do I want to know or discuss it! That is, until his wife walked up—knowing nothing about what we were talking about nor anything about the book—just when he got to the part about how they "made out for an hour recently" on their anniversary weekend and she was frantically trying to cover his mouth to keep him from saying another word to us! (I'm 100% certain that was all he was ever going to divulge!)

I once went to a marriage enrichment class led in person by author Gary Chapman. (now well-known for his book The Five Love Languages.) One of his sessions was called, "All He Thinks About Is S*x! It was such a practical class on how men and women think! Girls, this is important to your husband! He said if you had to schedule itschedule it! 
It's so important to have Christian friends. Later, my husband gathered everyone together on the porch and we prayed for our country and prayed for our election! It was such a glorious evening of fun and fellowship. It all began with being in a Bible- believing church. If you are not in a church where Christ is lifted up, I pray you will find one! I'll see you next week right back here. Have a great Lord's Day tomorrow!
Walk by Faith,    


  1. What's one if the dare's?

  2. (I re-edited this Oct 14 reply in Feb/2013 after realizing I missed coding one instance of the word s*x in the original comment & recieved a lot of spam not knowing why! That is why I reposted the reply to Nicole today:

    Hi Nicole! I'll give you two that I'm comfortable putting on Internet. I'm still praying about how much to say!!! Modesty forbids me to say too much:-) Know that this is all in the context of the Biblical framework of no s*x before a man and a woman marry, & lots of it for a lifetime after marriage for the two to become one physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

    (these samples from Sheila Gregoire's book I picked are a couple of the mild ones... she includes mediums... and some full-strength spicy):

    "Throw a lingerie fashion show—with only him as the audience."

    "Start your evening in bed together by reading Scripture or praying while holding hands. Even pray naked! Connect spiritually first, and the physical connection will be even better."


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